Many people sign up for dating websites, but then drop out because they find the process to be emotionally draining

The third form of friction is related to the first two. People don’t just pursue the path of least resistance when it comes to things involving effort. They pursue the path of least resistance when it comes to their emotions. Loran cites the example of a challenge faced by US army recruiters. Loran Nordgren: Much like the Beach House case, army recruiters want more recruits, they want better recruits. And they’re mostly targeting junior and seniors in high school. And very often you see these people who are excited by the idea and army life for the right person is heavily fueled. There’s patriotism, so meaning comradery, connection, professional advancement opportunities. You see these people who are clearly intrigued, excited by the idea, but many of them, a significant proportion of them, never enlist.

And a reason why is because they’re afraid to tell mom and dad, and for many of them, it’s the anxiety around what parents will say, how they’ll respond that leads them to simply never follow their dream. Shankar Vedantam: Now you can try to push harder on the idea of joining the army. This is the fuel based approach, but remember the people the army wanted to persuade were already sold on the idea. That wasn’t what was holding them back. Lauren says the army came up with a different approach to reduce emotional friction. Loran Nordgren: The army recruiter has scripts that can help the student have that conversation. Anecdotally, we’ve heard cases of recruiters even volunteer to have that conversation or be in the room when that conversation takes place.

Shankar Vedantam: So people experience emotional friction, even when it comes to doing things that they’re highly motivated to do. Celý příspěvek →